Defenestration, Douchebags, Depictions, and the worst assault on Māori in decades.
Caesar on a TV Screen - it's The Last Dinner Party.
And just for a second, I could be one of the greats
I am Caesar on a TV screen, champion of my fate
No one can tell me to stop, I'll have everything I want, anyone
And everyone will like me then
Everyone will love me
Defenestration, that’s not a word they teach you in school. I learned it from a Lonely Planet guidebook in Prague, the place it originated.
On this day in history, the 30th of July 1419, the first Defenestration of Prague took place when a crowd of Hussites, an early Protestant movement, killed seven members of the city council by throwing them out of the window.
So a few questions:
Did this sort of thing happen often?
Well, it’s referred to as the first defenestration as there were others. In 1483 a similar number of councillors were also flung from windows.
Then in 1618 it was the turn of religious officials, although they survived the fall. According to the Catholics they were saved by either angels or the intervention of the Virgin Mary. Whereas if you believe the Protestants their survival was on account of them falling into a dung heap .
As recently as 1948 Jan Masaryk, the Czech foreign minister, died by exiting a window. The official report of the new communist government ruled it suicide. Reports in former Warsaw Pact countries often said things like that.
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So they have a word, just for that?
Yes, that’s the thing that surprised me at the time. Not that there was a tradition of biffing officials out the window, but that they had a specific word for it.
After the third time it happened they gave it a name. Possibly recognising there’d be an ongoing need for such a term. Which brings us to question #3.
Should we be defenestrating here?
Definitely not. Is obviously the correct answer, but where’s the fun in that? Seriously though, I’m not in favour of, or advocating, any form of violence against politicians. Or in fact anyone else.
Even if it looks like you’re getting an enormous rates increase. You can’t just wander into a council building and start chucking those responsible through available apertures. C’mon people, it’s not the middle ages. We’ve got the best democracy money can buy, no need for defenestration - just vote them out.
As for you people who’ve already thought of someone to throw first… well, who was it?
Maybe a new flight plan for Mr I used to run Air NZ? Perhaps a bit of, “if you’ll just look out of this window Nicola, you can see your house from here”?
I’m guessing quite a few of you thought of Mr Seymour. Did you imagine him smirking and raising a Point Of Order, mid flight? Naughty naughty.
Throwing David Seymour out of a window is definitely not the right approach. I mean c’mon, you can’t just open a window in a modern office building - an empty lift shaft would be a much realistic option.
Curiously as I typed that last sentence I got one of the words wrong. OK that in itself is not unusual, but instead of “empty lift shaft” my brain, or fingers, decided to write “empathy lift shaft”. Hmm perhaps that should be a “lack-of-empathy lift shaft”?
Either way we shouldn’t push Seymour down one.
No windows and no lift shafts. I prescribe a swift knee to the bollocks, followed by a nice cup of tea and a bit of a sit down and shut up. Not so much as a gentle push, just to see what sound he’d make. I imagine it’d be a dull thud, not dissimilar to the distant noise that would’ve occurred if he’d lived out his fantasy of bombing the Ministry for Pasifika.
So that’s a no to defenestrating Dave. Even if he’s making us look like a bunch of racist plonkers to the wider world.
That headline’s from the Guardian in the UK, do you feel proud?
On the one hand it’s shameful to be associated with that man. Embarrassing that Kiwis elected a PM so cravenly weak that he lets Mr 8% spout his anti Māori nonsense, dressed up as a desire for equality. As if ACT voters want equality.
On the other, it’s great to see such thorough analysis, looking into the divisive desires of people who at their core, beyond the fake concerns peddled to those whose privilege far exceeds their intellect, are straight out racist.
“The worst assault on Māori in decades.”
It’s worth taking a look at both ‘Dangerous’ and ‘retrograde’: Māori leaders sound alarm over policy shifts in New Zealand, and Revealed: the impact of New Zealand’s changes to policies affecting Māori. The following quote is from the latter link:
“The coalition has said it is committed to improving outcomes for Māori and all New Zealanders. But experts say the changes will have a disproportionate and negative impact on Indigenous communities, describing some tougher laws as ‘retrograde’ and the proposed review of the principles of the Treaty of Waitangi, New Zealand’s founding document, as the ‘worst assault on Māori’ in decades.”
Dangerous depictions.
As you’ve probably seen one of the biggest talking points to come out of the opening ceremony of the Olympic games, other than the magnificent performance by Celine Dion and TVNZ sports reporters moaning about the rain, has been the supposed depiction of The Last Supper by drag queens.
I appreciate it’s not that great a leap, given the tendency of those who attended the fabled dinner a couple of thousand years ago to get about in frocks, but as it turns out it represented the Greek God Dionysus anyway.
Of course the fact that it had nothing to do with Christianity didn’t stop some from taking offence. Keep in mind that this is at an Olympic Games that Israel is attending. Yep, ponder on that. Israel is there, but people are offended by this.
So that’s kind of mental.
By the way all that stuff I said above about not pushing politicians out of windows or down lift shafts… Yeah, not so much for Netanyahu. That man needs to be tried for war crimes, and there is no punishment too great for his wickedness.
This was a huge opportunity for courageous countries to boycott the games. The IOC are a repugnant organisation but I reckon even they’d have considered doing the right thing if a hundred or so countries had told them if Israel is there - we won’t be.
Anyway back to this furore over The Last Supper. It was all rather curious - it’s not like artists down the centuries haven’t used a little license portraying the scene.
Yet the professionally offended were not happy, which kind of goes with the job description I suppose.
Piers Morgan whined, “Btw, what the f*ck was all this about? A drag queen mockery of the Last Supper at the Olympics? Would they have mocked any other religion like this? Appalling decision.”
There were many angry responses. Mostly from Americans, that odd breed who cling to their bibles almost as tightly as their guns. Things like “an absolutely disgusting mockery of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ”, “God is watching”, “Demonic globalists playing their games”, “The audacity to do it with a child on stage too.. arrest all of them”.
Let’s be honest, the people complaining weren’t actually upset for religious reasons. This was their opportunity to score some points in whatever weird culture war they’re undertaking against the rainbow community, and to claim that Christianity is under attack and it’s not fair because nobody would dare mock Islam.
To which I would say, turn on that right wing TV News channel you worship and see if there’s any criticism of muslims, you’ll find plenty. But be careful which FOX show you choose, because some of them are downright blasphemous!
Even if the ceremony had been depicting The Last Supper, it was in celebration of the world coming together. If anything it would’ve been beautiful recognition of a famous artwork.
Meanwhile Israel still competes.
Personally I reckon Jesus would’ve been fine with the drag queens, but rather less enthusiastic about a country that’s murdering his fellow Palestinians. I’m a long time lapsed as a Christian, but I remember the bit about “thou shalt not kill”. The bloke up front in the dress seemed quite certain of that.
If you’re offended by the idea of a female Caesar you might like to give this a miss. If not, give it a whirl - it’s very cool. The Last Dinner Party - Caesar on a TV Screen.
Defenestration is a superb word. I recall Billy Connolly recounting a pub fight in Glasgow and including the line “Jimmy, pick ya windy”. As for trying it on the present coal-ition, if we were to go down that (flight)path the order would be important as later launches would have a lot of bloated politicians to cushion their fall
I saw defenestration at an old pub at the top of Symonds St from an upstairs bar thankfully the guy wasn't hurt, he landed on the footpath veranda about a metre below the window sill.
As for the "best democracy money can buy" is that similar to that aus police force that had the "best police money can buy".
You mention no country boycotts from Israel at the Olympics. Well I'm doing my own boycott, no watch, no read.