No Alarms And No Surprises

They Don't Speak For Us?

A heart that's full up like a landfill
A job that slowly kills you
Bruises that won't heal
You look so tired, unhappy
Bring down the government
They don't, they don't speak for us
I'll take a quiet life
A handshake of carbon monoxide

And no alarms and no surprises

---

The fabulous English comedian Stewart Lee once wrote a book called “If You Prefer a Milder Comedian Please Ask For One”, which contained a transcript of one of his shows along with notes explaining his thought process in writing the jokes.

I found it a great read. I loved hearing about some of the references I might not have readily understood from half a world away and the comedic mechanisms he employed.

So you might be thinking, "That’s nice, Nick. You like a book—well done." Now, do you think we could have a newsletter, please? Maybe something to highlight what a bare-faced liar Nicola Willis is. We’ve seen a bit of that this week, and it’s only Wednesday. In a non-sitting week. Sheesh.

I could tell you about what a great over-inflated bag of wind Shane Jones is, or more on Luxon’s embarrassing man-handling of foreign dignitaries. Crime, Education, Health - good lord, there’s so much. Not to mention the economy, which National seem as adept at managing as Liz Truss, and they had the opportunity to learn from her woeful example - not bloody copy it.

Those are nice, easy subjects we can all agree on. There is nothing controversial there that might annoy people. Who shall we have in the stocks today? Reti, Costello, hmm—probably not Netanyahu. It's best not to mention him. Someone might get upset. In fact, they might get offended before they’ve even read the newsletter.

This morning I got up at stupid o’clock and found a flurry of comments on the post I’d made about that Israel newsletter. Some of them weren’t very nice. There were a bunch that basically equated my pleas for humanity with support for genocide. Don’t you just love waking up in the morning to find people accusing you of supporting mass murder? It's a great way to start the day.