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There once was a Mayor called Wayne.

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There once was a Mayor called Wayne.

Nick Rockel
Jan 28
50
14
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There once was a Mayor called Wayne.

nickrockel.substack.com

There once was a mayor called Wayne

Who observed there was terrible rain

He said - we really need this to stop

I’m no good with bucket and mop

Perhaps it will just go down the drain

Saturday Morning
RNZ

His council said call an emergency

He replied, what’s with all the urgency?

I’m having a nice cuppa of tea

Then I might go for a wee

The bladder is not what it used to be


There once was a comms man called Hooton

Who always liked putting the boot in

Wayne, I seldom let you talk

Try not to be a dork

Right now you’re as popular as Putin


There once was a broadcaster called Kim

Who said Mr Mayor, you seem rather dim

Rescuers were floating in boats

While you looked for scapegoats

Good lord she thought, who voted for him?

Genna Hukui/Stuff

There once was a PM called Chippy

Who thought listening to Wayne was quite trippy

Focus Wayne, for heaven’s sake!

Homes are ruined, the domain is a lake

Roads flow like the Mississippi


So ends the tale of Mayor Brown

Who failed to lead for his town

Folks do try to stay home

It’s a bit late to moan

If you’d voted, we wouldn’t have this clown.

May be a cartoon of text

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Nick's Kōrero

Political satire, views, stories and news from Aotearoa New Zealand.
By Nick Rockel
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There once was a Mayor called Wayne.

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14 Comments
Margie
Jan 28Liked by Nick Rockel

Love it Nick! Despite the laugh though, it also makes me quite sad thinking of the lack of support and leadership for those caught directly in this mess. While noone can undo the disaster, it makes a huge difference having timely empathy and leadership in such times. Where did you get that superb photo of our PM looking horrified at what he’s hearing?

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Janis Tonga-Climo
Jan 29Liked by Nick Rockel

Oh dear. I'e just been reading comments about Wayne Brown on Reddit. He is certainly not popular right now. Many people are saying they certainly did not get any txt to alert them to be prepared to evacuate, and that a state of emergency was being called.Waka Kotahi are unbelievable closing down their information centre right at the height of the emergency. The minister gave them a short shift and told them to get back online. Unbelieveable the comment Brown made about Wellington and coping in an earthquake. Kim said it was a low blow but Brown is incapable of realising how inappropiate it was. He makes excuses all the time. He shows signs of being a narcissist. Kim was very polite to him through clenched teeth it sounded like.! Al those houses in Auckland that have slipped down banks and cliffs. Brown's contribution to that was some of them probably shouldn't have been there in the first place. Many of them have been there for a very long time I'm sure. Looking at those houses I have some concern for my place which is cantilevered over a very steep cliff. My section slopes down has several retaining walls and lots of trees which I have thought would stop slips happening. I am now revising that thought. The house does have steel girders under the road to hold it in place but if the road goes the house will go. This flooding in Auckland shows all of us it can happen anywhere. In Dunedin we have very old pupes and the city is built on a lot of reclaimed land. With climate change nothing is safe. Wayne Brown might think it is too early to talk about climate change but Kieran McNaulty is certain what is happening around the country are the intense effects of climate change.Wayne Brown is an ignorant dickhead. i can't believe he is now the Mayor of Auckland. I lived in Auckland for many years and I love Auckland. It is terrible to see so many areas affected by floods. My Mum and stepfather lived in Hillcrest on the North shore between Glenfield, and Northcote. That area seems to habe been hit badly.

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