There is madness in the method

Samuel Julian Uffindell has had a memorable week.

Not memorable like being a third former getting the crap beaten out of you by four 6th formers in your bed.

“at age sixteen was expelled after participating in a violent attack on a younger student. The victim, who was 13, suffered severe bruising and trauma. Police were not involved. After the matter came to light in 2022, Uffindell said he could not recall if he and the other attackers used wooden bed legs as a weapon, but could not rule it out.”

Not memorable like having a flat-mate out of their mind on who knows what substances screaming “get out fatty” at you in your Uni flat until you escape.

“a woman who flatted with Uffindell in 2003 described him as a bully who once pounded on her bedroom door, screaming obscenities, until she fled through her window. Uffindell denied these bullying allegations but did admit he "enjoyed a student lifestyle", including drinking alcohol and smoking cannabis”

But memorable it was nonetheless. Like Brett “I like beer” Kavanaugh explaining his student activities.

What made the selectors think that not only was it a good idea to pick him, but that they could get away with it and nobody would notice?

After all the disastrous candidate selections they have made in recent years you think they’d have learnt, but such is the arrogance they think they can just get away with it. And it isn’t like they have inadvertently picked people with the odd skeleton; it is like they deliberately choose the absolutely worst people they can find.

This isn’t about Sam, we all knew a few Sams at school, the cocky bullies, we just assumed they’d end up waxing cars like Biff in Back To The Future, not in parliament.

No, this is about a process that is so broken it is like an HR warning of what not to do – now people do we really want to pick school bullies to be our MPs? Turns out the answer is “yes - yes we do”.

The fake apologies, the failure to disclose his past to voters if it was something he wanted to “move on from”, the story about a staffer in Luxon’s team being told but them not passing on the message to the leader?

I know the party appears to have a general disdain for the public, but come on give us a bit of credit - we can see what you’re doing! Next thing you’ll be telling us it was Christopher’s office that did it while he was out feeding the cat - anyone remember Moonbeam?

We’ve all done something wrong when we were 14, we were idiots. Maybe we broke a few windows or got caught smoking, our hair was too long or we bunked off school. What we don’t all have is hazing a junior kid as part of a gang three years older, beating them up four-on-one with weapons.

And does anyone believe for one second that a private school like King’s expels a fine young future leader like Sam over a single incident? Yeah right!

The committee thought he’d just get away with it, and so did he. What the heck were they thinking? Apparently Sam has now been stood down while they take time to look into his background - um isn’t that what the selection committee was for?

Sam Uffindell came to parliament saying we need to crack down on youth offending, on crime and gangs; presumably he didn’t mean that committed by white private school boys.

And how careless of National to have the whole thing come out at the same time as their best poll result in years - mighty unfortunate really. Mighty unfortunate.

To be fair they had acknowledged a problem and finally, after so many disastrous candidate calls, had replaced one President in the weekend only to find out the new President knew all about Sam’s “boys will be boys” behavior. Poor old National, out of the frying pan into the nothing to see here - look over there, pretend the emperor is wearing clothes, dumpster fire of a replacement (I’m talking about Sam to be clear).

As I keep saying this party, these committees with these processes, will be selecting another 20-30 people for their list who will become MPs next year with no input from the public other than their party vote. These committees have shown repeatedly they can’t select a single decent human being, let alone 20-30 of them.

These people will choose about a quarter of the MPs in the next parliament, not the public, not local constituents, but the people who keep finding the absolute worst people in the world. Sociopath bankers with back stories that would rule out any other candidate – to represent the interests of their voters, or at least of their sponsors.

The only way the general public has of ensuring parliament does not end up with more people like Sam, because you know the good people of Tauranga would elect him again in a heartbeat, or in fact a fence post in a blue suit – preferably a racist one, is to ensure they don’t give their party vote to National. That is it.

Even ACT seems to have a better selection policy and their list beyond number three is people you can only assume won their place on the list as second prize, a consolation gift, in a pub meat raffle.

It also makes you wonder what the heck our media were doing. New Zealand is a small place surely investigating Sam’s activities and reputation wouldn’t have been overly onerous, at least they could have checked his academic record?

Maybe more time being reporters less time pronouncing wide eyed shock at trivial matters might be a plan?

They’re like reporters sent to investigate a mass prison escape who report they are shocked to find the prisoners left with three jars of Vegemite but only one of Peanut Butter and they declare the clear finding from all of this is that the CEO of Sanitarium must resign!

Meanwhile in the background of the shot with the reporter delivering the news the escaped prisoners can be clearly seen on the grass verge outside of the prison having a picnic.

You’d think the selection committee would be able to find one candidate that did not send dick pics to students, make Nazi salutes, or beat up much younger students with a weapon in a premeditated assault - but apparently that is too much to ask. What odds they can find thirty of them?

Imagine what any candidates of other ethnicity think as yet again the chosen candidate is white, wealthy and male regardless of their character or history. Why would you bother putting your hand forward?

For once there is a solution - if you don’t think it’s right that in 2022 a party is picking white male thugs over people of other races who have done nothing wrong, a misogynist pig over talented women, a party selecting school bullies as the type who represents what they are about…

Don’t vote for them - Don’t be part of the problem.

Meanwhile, play it again Sam…